Kinda.
I was thinking today, about how I’ve lived my life for the past sixteen years. And I say sixteen because I’ve tried to change who I am a little bit for the better this year, because I didn’t like who I was. But I have a question, as usual. Can you make up for your past and how you acted by changing and becoming a “better” person? I don’t know. I try to be really nice to people and help them out when they have issues, and give advice when I think it’s relevant or atleast decent enough to share, but I do it to feel better about myself and what I jerk I can be/am/was sometimes. I share my lunch because I used to hecka mooch off of people in middle school, and I’m trying to make up for that. It’s like if I’m good enough for these next sixteen years, it’ll cancel out these previous years, and I’ll start over and be back at ground zero again. Something tells me it doesn’t work like that. I don’t know. I really think that you can change someone’s opinion/view of you, but you can’t change everyone’s. And what if you only wanted to change someone’s opinion of you, but they’re the one person you couldn’t change? I’m so scared of leaving a horrible impression upon someone I care immensely about…
And reading this, I sound incredibly stupid and whiny. Fabulous.
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